He loves you, respects you and is super charming. He can’t possibly be sexist, right? Wrong. Sexism is the idea that one sex is more superior than the other. It is this ideology that breeds all kinds of stereotypes and gender roles and it primarily affects women and girls.
Some extremely sexist men may feel so entitled that they participate in or defend horrible acts like sexual harassment, rape, and other gender-based violence. But sexism may be subtle as well. Your man can have the intrinsic belief that deep down, he’s better than you just because he’s male. Here are some signs that he’s sexist.
1. He doesn’t care about your career goals
When he asks you about future plans, his questions revolve around how many kids you want to have, how many meals you can make and other stereotypical gender-based roles. He does not care much for your financial or career goals because he cannot link those to things a woman would have.
2. He resorts to name-calling when talking about his exes (or women in general)
He may not verbally insult you but he may insult other women. He describes them using derogatory terms. This could be the way he sees all women in general.
3. He has his own idea of what a woman ‘should’ be
Again, he may not be directly referring to you. But one of the signs he’s sexist is if he has his own ‘philosophy’ of who a woman is. The problem with this is that he believes all women are alike and therefore, they should want the same things. This is also an area where stereotypes come into play.
4. He says you’re not like other women
This isn’t the compliment that it sounds like. It’s his way of implying that something is wrong with all other women and it’s very insulting. In addition, these types of statements try to pit women against each other. For example “you’re not like my ex,” is supposed to automatically make you feel like you’re in competition with the said ex.
5. He only compliments your looks
The only thing that is worth being admired is your looks. That’s what a sexist partner thinks. Again, this is subtle to pinpoint because you probably feel flattered. But beware of men who would look past all your achievements and only focus on what you look like.
6. He doesn’t talk about women’s issues
When you bring up the topic of women being abused, assaulted or discriminated against, he just clamps down. He either tells you to let it go or he has no useful contribution to the conversation. Simply put, he does not care about women or their troubles.
Why should you care about these signs?
If he’s good to you, does it matter if he’s sexist? Well, yes. For example, a man who cares for you and protects you may not seem sexist now. But keep in mind that this type of partner will feel uncomfortable with a woman who significantly out-earns him at some point.
If this happens, he can begin to resent you, feel insecure or even become downright hostile/abusive towards you, thereby, completely ruining the relationship. So watching out for signs he’s sexist would help you see past what he is now to what he’s capable of becoming.
For more on the topic, find out how traditional gender roles are ruining sex for women.
Featured Image via Glee.Wikia