When it comes to love, the goal is to find a partner that fulfills some of your most important needs, but what happens when the love of your life happens to be someone from a different tribe?
This is a big deal in Nigeria, but the good news is that many couples that have managed to make a relationship work despite their tribal differences. So, if you’re dating someone from a different tribe, here are a few things you should know:
Talk about it
When you and your partner are from different tribes, you cannot act like it’s not an issue. Talk about what this could mean. Are you both okay with it? Are there some major cultural differences that you should both know about? Talk about your family’s view on the matter. Ask each other questions so you can have a pretty good idea where you both come from and what your roots mean to you. You can also discuss possible future plans. For example, if you plan to get married, will you have your traditional wedding in his state, in yours or both? These discussions help you see if there’s an actual future for you both and not just some romanticized idea that you have.
Spending time with the family
When you’re dating someone from a different tribe, your family’s views can have an impact on the relationship. If you want a future together, you have to get to know each other’s family members. You should give them a chance to see you as more than just that Yoruba girl or that Igbo girl and vice versa. Plan occasions and invite your partner to events where you can all mix. Hopefully, the more time they spend with you, the more likely they see past your state of origin and get to know you for you. The same goes for your partner.
Not everyone will be on board
Even though we all like to think we’re past the tribe thing, there are still people that won’t take too kindly with a family member dating someone from a different tribe. Not everyone will be supportive of your choice. So it’s up to you to figure out whose opinions really count and go from there. And if it seems like you’re getting absolutely no support from your loved ones, then you have to decide if the relationship can survive despite that.
For more, find out the five important things to know before meeting his parents.
Featured Image via Bella Naija